Bullies.

When I was in elementary school, I was bullied. A lot.

I don't know why I was the target of schoolyard (and school room, and school library, and school bus... ) bullying, but it was absolutely merciless. The taunting would give me stomach aches so severe that my parents eventually took me to the hospital to rule out a serious medical condition. My mother and father did go to the principle, but little was done. If I remember correctly, the school administrators actually told the bullies that my parents had registered a complaint, and that only made everything worse.

Eventually, I switched schools, and the bullying stopped. I was able to move on with little lingering damage. Phoebe Price, a South Hadley, Massachusetts resident, wasn't able to "move on." After a final day of being exhaustively taunted, the 15 year old hung herself in her parents' home. Her 12 year old sister was the one who discovered her body.

This case has received some national and significant local media attention. You can read about it here and here.

Nine students have been charged with crimes related to her death, and three of them will be tried as adults. State officials have also condemned the faculty members of her school who apparently knew she was being bullied, and did little to nothing to stop it. Citizens of South Hadley are calling for their resignation.

This case makes me sick to my stomach.

Children can be cruel, and to a certain extent, there's not a whole lot we can do about it. Empathy and compassion are traits that I believed are learned, and not necessarily inherent in all people. There will always be someone that's pushed on the playground. Still, there's a line. And it needs to be drawn much earlier than it was for Phoebe, and will be for future victims.

I'm sure there will be some who say that her bullies (who I refuse to call children, because the extent of their manipulation shows a level of intelligence that puts them beyond a title that claims innocence), while cruel, should not be sentenced to imprisonment or given a record that will follow them for the rest of their lives.

I can't disagree more.

For every action, there is a reaction. Every decision, whether it's been carefully chosen or hastily made, has a consequence. When you, as a student, choose to taunt someone for, if some of what I have seen is correct, months, and she decides she can no longer live with your cruelty, you need to be punished. Strongly and irreversibly.

When you, as a school administrator, become so jaded that you believe "kids will be kids," and stop looking out for the interests of children you've been entrusted to teach and protect, you deserve to lose your job. Permanently.

I hope that Phoebe's taunters are given the maximum punishment available for their crimes. And I hope that this story brings bulling more national attention. The more people see how devastating it can be, the more I believe will be done to stop it.

This RAIN...

We've been preparing for the next coming of Noah here in Massachusetts.
The rain is making me sleepy and lethargic.
I can barely string sentences together, let alone try to find something witty to say.

Instead, here's a list of things I'm thankful for when the weather gets foul:

A warm puppy that likes to snuggle.
New raincoats in bright colors.
HUNTER RAINBOOTS (I do not care that they are overpriced and trendy, they make me feel as if I'm on some sort of farm and I like it).
Grilled cheese and tomato soup.
Reruns of old favorites (When Harry Met Sally, anyone?).
c jane enjoy it.
The snooze button.
The countdown to vacation I've put on every calendar I own (23 days counting today!).

Also, today's the day that this blog goes "public," as in, Southern and I are going to start putting new posts up on Facebook. I just decided.

Let's see how that goes.

This is a Test.

To see if I can embed videos.

Incidentally, this is exactly how I felt when Spring Break ended. Spring Break as a teacher is much more necessary and exciting than it is when you are a student. Trust.

Why is fitness so controversial?

Since Southern B mentioned some new and superb songs to power up your workout (which I have already downloaded and tested thankyouverymuch), I thought I'd share a little rant I have about working out and fitness in general.

I think you could ask any woman, and she'd tell you that at one point in her life, she's been jealous of another woman's shape. I don't think that's a bad thing, so long as it doesn't become all consuming. Sometimes, seeing something you desire in others pushes you to get after it yourself.

A little jealousy can go a long way when it comes to fitness. In fact, seeing another girl running longer or faster on the treadmill next to me always pushes me to ramp up my efforts... and if she looks great in a pair of yoga pants I've been lusting after, WELL, let's push for the extra mile, shall we?

My rant is not the jealousy, it's how I feel some people manifest that feeling by begrudging the girl who's working it on the elliptical over yonder.

Today in the Boston Globe, an article was written about women and exercise. Specifically, how a new Brigham and Women’s Hospital study argues that women who begin with a healthy body weight should be aiming for 60 minutes of exercise a day. Presumably, that would mean women who don't have a healthy body weight should be doing more than that, if they're trying to loose. While older guidelines have always been around 30 to 60 minutes, I think conventional wisdom has always rounded down to 30 (which, incidentally, is the US Department of Health and Human Services’ standard).

I can already imagine the backlash I'd receive if I showed this article to some of my friends ("MORE EXERCISE?!"). It's no secret that healthy eating and exercise have become a large part of my life in the past few years, but I still find it absolutely shocking how many people seem to be bothered by it.

The same goes for celebrities. Why do people, and women in particular, get so angry when they see a healthy celebrity being photographed coming out of the gym? Are they threatened? Why do they feel the need to say "I could do that, if I had a trainer/chef/person I could miraculously pay to run for me?"

Look, you may not ever look like a model. That's normal! But lots of everyday people manage to look great all on their own, and I bet a little gym time and eating in moderation had something to do with it. It's not about how skinny you look, it's about how healthy you are. So stop telling me how you could look like that if you just did what they were doing, and do it! There's nothing worse than being jealous of something and doing nothing to quell that feeling.

Don't judge the other girl for doing her thing, just do yours. Let just a little bit of jealousy help to get you to the place where you can honestly say that you're doing the best you can to be healthy... and then unabashedly ask the girl next to you where she got those cute running shoes.

Temperature Elevates, World Mourns (Running Music)

As spring approaches, one must take a serious look at the lethargy and overwhelming sloth of the past few months. Months when one could sit idly on a couch and say “it is simply too cold to go outside and move around with an elevated heartbeat for over 30 minutes.” Out here on the Rez there is no gym, no treadmills, no fun workout classes. There are just sandy trails snaking through low shrubs and (seriously) tumbleweed.
For this reason, I have not exercised in any meaningful way for a long time. The snow has almost completely melted, along with my excuses. It is time to brush the dust off the old iPod, pull on my trail-runners, and venture outside.
To help me cope with this sad reality, I have to have music get me through. I have compiled a list of my favorite running/workout songs. Hopefully they will bring you some solace and aid you as you attempt to peel yourself away from your cheesy poofs and dinners-for-two eaten by one.
1. Fatboy Slim – Weapon of Choice
Awesome. Also Christopher Walken dances in the video.
2. David Guetta ft. Akon – Sexy Bitch
Makes you feel like a Sexy B while running.
3. Lights – Saviour
The chorus is catchy.
4. K’Naan – Waving Flag
Inspirational for long runs.
5. Britney Spears – 3
Nothing beats a good Britney jam.
6. Florence and the Machines – Dog Days are Over
I can't get over this song. I love it.
7. Beck – Timebomb
Tick Tick Tick
8. Cake – Shut the F*ck Up
First, its Cake. Second, the lyric "like sharpened knives through chicken McNuggets."
9. Ladyhawke – Dusk Till Dawn
Catchy and fun to run to.
10. The Who – Baba O’Riley
For some reason, this makes the time on a run go much faster. You can also imagine you are on CSI.
11. Lupe Fiasco – Solar Midnite
Good.
12. Wyclef Jean ft. Maya – Ghetto Superstar
Elementary School Fave.
13. The Replacements – Alex Chilton
I once did a beautiful choreographed dance for KW to this song. It makes you want to bob your head up and down. I don't know why.
14. Garbage – Paranoid
Because its Garbage.
15. Sublime – April 29, 1992
So you can feel like a Badass
16. Ben Folds Five – Army
I love songs with Piano in them.
17. Hellogoodbye – Here in Your Arms
This is a good car song as well.
18. Gorillaz – Feel Good Inc.
A bit of a throw back.
19. Jay-Z – Dirt Off Your Shoulders
Ladies is pimps too.
20. The XX – Crystalized
Good for zoning out.
21. K’Naan – T.I.A.
Because DiCaprio said it.


Happy Running,

I'm pretty sure angels shop at Anthropologie

Like many girls, shopping is my biggest vice. I can't resist the allure of new things, especially when they're beautiful and on sale.

Since graduating from college, I've had to be better with my budget, so I only allow myself to shop for occasions these days. Unfortunately, there are a few problems with that mindset. One, you never know when an occasion will pop up, and you'll need to have something fabulous on hand. Two, I could classify walking the dog as an occasion.

Therefore, sometimes I find myself in Anthropologie with the "occasion" (in this case, a wedding) months away, ready to shop. And wouldn't you know it, I found a few things!

(Image from anthropologie.com)

Andddd...

(Also from anthropologie.com)

What do you think? These could be worn for MANY occasions, right?

Right.

So I totally didn't break my budget rule.

Attention span of a goldfish.

It's a widely accepted fact that Southern B and I have the cutest dogs in the world. I've always been very thankful that Henry's a boy and Abby's a girl, so we wouldn't have to compete between who has the cutest boy/girl in the world. They're the cutest gender duo, and that works well for their mama's egos.

But, as in real life, the cuter you are, the more high maintenance you tend to be... at least with Abby. That pup wants all of my attention, all the time. Part of it may be that she's just a year old and still has lots of energy to burn, but I tend to believe that she has taken after me, and will never grow out of it. Girlfriend just wants love and attention, and can I fault her for that?

Abby's also very easily distracted, which has it's pros and cons. Pro? She will always drop whatever she has if she sees a plush toy with a squeaker. Con? She will NOT do her business outside if she sees a child.

ANY child. And while it was cute for a while, my mornings are getting increasingly more difficult as more and more children are walking to school in the nice weather.

Part of the issue is that Abby's dog park is literally right in front of an elementary school (good planning Town, I bet there's never been a single issue with children stepping in something right before they go into a crowded, non-airconditioned room in the spring). I'll frantically rush doing my makeup to try to get her there before 8:00, which appears to be the time most kids run into class, but sometimes it just can't be done. And those mornings are the worst.

At first she won't notice them, and start sniffing around for the best possible place to do whatever it is she's planning to do. Sometimes, she'll even be halfway through finishing up when all the sudden, she'll spot one. A small boy, skipping jauntily, perhaps with a ball under his arm.

BAM. She'll start running towards him, full speed, leash and collar around her neck forgotten. I'll try to catch up, but I'm never fast enough, and she'll end up flying in the air and thrown about as she reaches the end of her leash, and I reach the end of my proverbial rope. The child will laugh, and continue moving towards class, and Abby will desperately try to follow him into the building.

I'll wait a few more seconds in vain, but once she's seen that first kid, she's not going to do anything. So, I'll drag her back to my apartment and spend the rest of the day praying she doesn't decide to finish what she started in my new shoes.

But she looks like this:

So I keep trying to get her out for a morning walk, and hope that school will be canceled tomorrow.

No. Just... no.

Okay, look.

There are some things that take the joy right out of me.

The photo below is one of them.

Why yes, that IS a Gap Factory shirt. And, yes, there IS a little bit of foundation on the collar.

Yes, it was found at T.J. Maxx. And no, there's no shame in a little discount shopping before picking up the dog at the groomer.

But NO, your eyes don't deceive you. That shirt is $99.99.

I'll write that out for you, in case you didn't get it the first time. Ninety-nine dollars and ninety-nine cents. One penny short of one hundred dollars. Ninety-nine, ninety-nine.

I could tell you that I brought this to the attention of an associate, and she told me that was the correct price. I could also tell you that I was dissatisfied with that answer, and brought it to another associate, who admitted it was probably a mistake.

But instead of making this post longer than it needs to be, let's just all take a moment to acknowledge that for a brief moment in time, a pre-worn, unwashed, Gap outlet, ruffled and stripped shirt was priced at $99.99.

sweetea.

'Tis not Sweet Tea. It is sweetea.

One should pronounce it as one word.

Earlier today I walked into Thoreau, NM's general store.
Nickname: BJ's.
Official name: BJ's Kountry Store.

I saw a little plastic bottle of Lipton's tea called "Sweet Tea." My heart jumped into my stomach and I felt like doing a tiny dance, but wisely chose not too. I just adore sweet tea. It is the best thing in the universe. If I was Oprah, it would be at the top of my "Favorite Things" list every single year. I purchased the "Sweet Tea" and carried my prize to the car. I couldn't wait to open the bottle and try it out. I twisted the plastic top off, tipped the ambrosia to my lips, and then wanted to just shrivel up and die.

No bottled "Sweet Tea" has EVER tasted like the real thing. And yet, in my naivete, I have repeatedly tried any new brand in the vain hope it would actually be sweetea.

As a wee young girl, I worked in many a Southern eating establishment. Here, and at home, I learned the proper way in which to make sweetea.

You brew some of this:

And while it is still piping hot, you add a LOT of this:

You mix it up and basically continue adding sugar until the mixture can hold no more.

Pour in one of these:

And pour over a glass of these:


If you are feeling VERY sassy, spontaneous, and CRAZY, you can add:

Or a wee sprig of:

As the weather warms, I encourage you to make and enjoy some sweetea for yourself.
Front porch, rocking chairs, porch swings, and gossiping are optional.






PS. let me know if you would like a recipe with more, say, measurements.

Anything with an average over 70, thanks.

Don't get me wrong, I love Massachusetts. I love the trees in the fall, the indian pudding and the distinct seasons. My family (well, at least some of my family, we have some rouges that have moved around) has lived in Massachusetts since 1620 and it's served us pretty well.

That being said, there are some mornings... like, oh, this one... where I think that it might be nice to wake up and not have to mentally calculate how fast I can turn on the space heater and hop back under the covers to wait for it to heat up the room to a balmy 60 degrees.

With that in mind, here are the two places I'd rather live than Boston. I'm going to give you a spoiler right now, too. Hawaii isn't one of them. People always say Hawaii and it drives me nuts because, really? Do you actually want to live in Hawaii, or is it just the only warm place you can think of right now? I've seen Dog the Bounty Hunter and Hawaii looks a little too rough and tumble for me.

1) Kiawah Island, South Carolina

(Image from About.com)
Okay, what is not to love? Lush, beautiful surroundings, southern hospitality and a Native American based name (I'm a sucker for the virtually unpronounceable). Full disclosure: I've never actually been to Kiawah Island, but I think that makes me love it more. That way, my mental image of sandy beaches and welcoming people can never be tarnished by the random weirdo on the street that keeps asking you where you're from. Don't pretend that you haven't dealt with that guy on vacation. He's always there, and he's often wearing a fanny pack.

2) San Francisco, CA

(Image from aptinternational.org)
I took a vacation with an ex-boyfriend to San Francisco a few years ago, and while the relationship didn't hold up, the love of the city did. The whole place is so charming and quirky. Have you ever been to their port area? Chowder in sour dough bread bowls. Everywhere. And also, um, Ghirardelli is based there. I think that's all we need to say about that.

Now, if you excuse me, I'm going to go mentally plan what I'd wear in each of these cities. Because in the imaginary world where I live there, I always dress really well have have naturally straight, thick hair.

Meet Henry.

Meet Henry.
Henry is a puggle. Half beagle/half pug.
When I got Henry, his estimated maximum weight was 15lbs. At his biggest he would be 15 pounds.
For the Hen dog, 15 pounds came and went.
He is now a respectable 35 pounds.
Many people refer to Henry in his lounging position as a "Loaf." With his paws tucked under his ample chin(s), he resembles a streamlined loaf of thick bakery bread.
When he visits his grandmother and grandfather in Tennessee, he shakes the house when he is on the top floor. He thunders across the wood floors, and can push the French doors open to take a dip in the pool.
Henry is, is the kindest way, a very husky dog. This isn't to say he is lazy. Mais non. D bought him an amazing dog pack so he can carry his own water, food, and supplies and hikes and camping trips. He loves going on runs with me in the afternoons, chasing tennis balls, and playing with his hedgehog. I am simply worried about his self-esteem. And his 17 chins.
The picture is of Henry in his favorite buffalo check sweater.

About Me...?

On second though, an "about me" post is sort of the same thing as your first diary entry that told the blank pages that you have a brother and a crush on Johnny from the boy's school. It was cringe-worthy then, and that was before I knew better.

So let's just go right into something, shall we?

Bathing suit season.

Last year, I randomly and uncharacteristically found the.perfect.suit. at J.Crew a few weekends before the first trip to the Cape. I wore that thing to death, which means this year I have to find something new. Of course, the Crew's too cool and with it to carry the same suit I had, so we're starting on page one.

I actually ordered eight individual tops and bottoms from another company this weekend, hoping to recreate the magic. They all came this afternoon. Did I find a suitable replacement?

NO.

EIGHT SUITS. And all of them made me look too wide, too thin, lanky, and stubby, all at the same time. Distressing.

Any ideas, blogosphere? I hear Spanx is making suits these days... although I'm not sure if that would allow me the same amount of breathing room as the good old bikini does for eating snacks by the ocean. Something to think about in the next month or so.

P.S. Southern B thinks we need sign offs. I can only think of Jerry Springer's "Take care of yourself, and each other." Not the image I'm going for.